YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF ME!
James Mehring wrote an interesting article in the July 10th edition of Business Week magazine. He wrote, “My daughter turned 19 months old this week. I have learned a lot over that time, but I still often feel like a deer caught in the headlights. Many times I don’t see what’s coming, and I am often not sure how to handle certain situations.” To that we say, “Welcome to parenthood!” right? “If you think you’re confused right now, wait until that girl becomes a teenager!” Mehring continues:
This past week I had another new experience that left me dumbfounded and dis-concerted. At a party, I was alone with four kids. While watching them color and play, one little girl decided to take a toy and shake it in my face. I asked her to stop a couple of times, but she refused. When I told her to stop (in a more assertive manner), the girl pulled out the classic line, “You’re not the boss of me!” (Then she) stomped away. Shortly after, the same (girl) decided to start pulling her friend’s leg, literally. After telling her to stop a couple of times, the girl again blurted out, “You’re not the boss of me!” Then she gave me an icy stare that bored a hole right through me.
“You’re not the boss of me!” Have you ever had that line used on you? I’ve heard my own kids use that line on each other. And, truth be told, sometimes when my wife tells me to do something, I’ll use that line on her! “You’re not the boss of me!” I say. She just says, “Yes I am,” and I end up having to do what she wanted me to do anyway.
Now believe it or not, if you get online, you can actually find that phrase defined. An outfit called “QUIZRO” defines it this way: “You’re not the boss of me” is a childish rebuttal to an order or a suggestion one does not wish to follow. It’s hard to argue with, unless, the person IS, in fact, your boss.
“You’re not the boss of me” is a phrase we hear from kids more and more all the time. But kids aren’t the only ones who have issues with authority. Erika Schickel is a Los Angeles, California writer and a mother of two. She wrote a book entitled, You’re Not the Boss of Me: Adventures of a Modern Mom.
Erika Schickel, it would seem, aims at becoming a somewhat irreverent version of Erma Bombeck. The book is intended to be humorous, I guess. For example, during the months of her pregnancy, she recorded the size of her baby. “Week 20 – Your baby is now the size of a small, clutch purse. Week 25 – Your baby is now the size of a crock pot. Week 36 – Your baby is now the size of a Barcalounger.”
The point of the book, however, is to justify the phrase, “You’re not the boss of me.” She breaks every cultural norm that society wants to impose upon a new mother. She writes about going out to strip clubs with her friends, while her husband stays home to baby-sit. She writes about slipping out to the back yard to smoke marijuana, while the kids are napping upstairs. No one’s going to tell Erika Schickel how to live her life! Like I said, kids aren’t the only ones who have issues with authority.
Respect for authority seems to be a casualty of postmodernism. Perhaps most of us understand authority as the right or power to command, enforce laws, or exact obedience.
Since the 1960s, however, this sort of authority has been under fire. I’m sure the Viet Nam War and Watergate had a lot to do with that. Society as a whole lost a lot of respect for its political leaders. Physicians lost authority when insurance companies started demanding second opinions. Now who can we trust to tell us how to get better when we’re sick? Clergy lost a lot of authority thanks to the likes of Jim Bakker and Jimmy Swaggart. Now who can we trust to tell us right from wrong?
Gerald F. Kreyche wrote an article addressing this issue in U.S.A. Today magazine, published by the Society for the Advancement of Education. The article was entitled, “The Demise of Moral Authority.” Listen to what he had to say:
There is also the authority that is the power to influence or persuade resulting from knowledge. For instance, we have scholars, physicians, and accountants who – as authorities – can serve as expert witnesses in their respective fields. We used to regard such people as worthy of belief and trust. However, this type of authority also has been challenged as – in an increasingly egalitarian society – more and more people falsely hold the ideology that one person’s opinion is as good as another’s. The protests against the above are rooted in the charge that all authority is oppressive and conflicts with the rights of the individual to do and believe whatever each desires. At rock bottom, individuals want to dispense with all authority and set up only themselves as judge and jury. People mistakenly have confused authority with authoritarianism.
Perhaps we could say that authority is no longer bestowed automatically. Perhaps now authority must be earned. It’s based on one’s conduct. It’s based on the depth of one’s personal character. It’s based on the level of one’s commitment. Authority may be difficult to define, but it does exist. And the fact of the matter is, we know it when we see it.
Such was the case in the passage we read from the gospel according to Mark. Jesus had recently called a few disciples. They went into Capernaum and on the Sabbath, Jesus entered the synagogue and taught. As it says in verse 22, “And they were astonished at his teaching, for he taught them as one who had authority, and not as the scribes.”
What does that mean? The scribes always taught by quoting other scholars or other writings. We could say that Jesus taught without quotation marks. Jesus taught as one who knew God personally. His authority was not bestowed automatically. After all, he was merely a carpenter’s son. Jesus earned his position of authority. Perhaps it was also based upon his conduct, his character and his commitment. In any case, those who were gathered in the synagogue that day knew it when they saw it.
Yet Jesus is not likely to stride into the pulpit of any church today. So how do we recapture his authority? Where are we to find the answers to what Jesus wants from us today? We find Christ revealed to us in the pages of Scripture, do we not? We find Jesus revealed to us in the words of the Bible.
Theologians distinguish between general revelation and special revelation. General revelation we might find in nature. How can you look at the intricacy of a human being, for example, and not see God? Special revelation is found in Jesus Christ. And we find Jesus Christ revealed to us nowhere but in the pages of Scripture, the preached word of the pulpit, and the gestures of hospitality and love portrayed by those who follow him.
The three go together. Jesus Christ is revealed in Scripture, so we would be wise to know what Scripture says. Jesus Christ is revealed to us in the preached word, so we would be wise to show up in church on a regular basis. But Jesus Christ is also revealed in the gestures of hospitality and love portrayed by those who follow him. So we would be wise to let the Holy Spirit give us some guidance as well.
The problem is, we forget that all three are important. Some want to thump their Bibles and claim ultimate authority. For example, Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Several years ago she said that – as an observant Orthodox Jew – homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura that was penned by an east coast resident and was posted on the Internet. It says:
Dear Dr. Laura,
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God’s law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them.
When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord, as it says in Leviticus 1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
Leviticus 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not to Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can’t I own Canadians? (Sorry, Kevin, but I’m on a roll!)
I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states that he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
Leviticus 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20 or is there some wiggle room here?
I know from Leviticus 11: 6 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but can I still play football if I wear gloves?
Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Leviticus 19:27. How should they die?
I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God’s word is eternal and unchanging. Your devoted fan, Jim.
That’s what happens when we thump our Bibles and claim ultimate authority. But like I said, authority comes from Scripture, the preached word, and the gestures of love and hospitality portrayed by those who follow him. Yet on the other hand, there are those who focus exclusively on the gestures of love and hospitality portrayed by those who follow him. In the process they leave out the authority of Scripture. They want to ignore the Levitical Code. Included in the Levitical Code are banishments against adultery, incest, bestiality and child sacrifice. WHERE DO WE DRAW THE LINE?
As you know, the Presbyterian Church is doing battle with that issue right now. There is a constitutional amendment that would change our standards for ordination. We had a meeting about it last Wednesday night, yet because of the weather, not many were able to make it. We’re going to be doing it again on Wednesday, the 11th of February.
It wasn’t a pleasant meeting. This issue is going to divide the church. And that’s what’s killing me. People are going to leave the church, regardless of how this issue is decided. The body of Christ is being torn asunder because people can’t see eye to eye. Where does the final authority rest? Which way are we to turn from here? What does Jesus want us to do?
We talked earlier about the authority of Jesus Christ. It is revealed in Scripture, it is revealed in the preached word, and it is revealed in the gestures of love and hospitality portrayed by those who follow him. We’ve seen what sole emphasis on Scripture can do. We’ve seen what sole emphasis on love and hospitality can do. I guess that leaves us the pulpit. The authority of Jesus Christ is revealed in all three, but let me take a stab at this from the pulpit.
We need to realize that this issue is beyond us. We need to realize that the center of all creation is not us. The center of all creation is God. And when we come to realize that, we will begin to be transformed. We will begin to see things more clearly. It’s a transformation analogous to that which takes place in the dusk of evening on a road. Suddenly we discern as a tree what we thought was a person, or we suddenly recognize as a rustling of leaves what we thought at first was whispering. We see the same colors – we hear the same sounds – but not in quite the same way.
To empty ourselves of false divinity; to deny ourselves as Jesus taught; to give up being the center of the world…that is to be transformed. And that is to begin to see things as God sees them. No, I’m not the boss of you. And you are not the boss of you. God is. And God wants us to get though this together. Amen.
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