LIVING THIS SIDE OF THE CROSS: PART XIII
There is a non-profit organization in northeast Ohio called Angels for Animals. They rescue abandoned dogs and cats and for a small fee, you can purchase one of those animals for yourself. My family and I went there to get a dog a number of years ago. The first one we considered was a very large dog named Samson. He had the body of a Great Dane and the head of a Scottish terrier. He really was an ugly dog, but I liked him. However, the rest of my family did not, so we ended up getting a beautiful German Shepherd/Labrador Retriever mix named Miss Mattie.
A few months later, I went to the home of a couple named Dr. Bob and Jody Wright. As I got out of my car, I was greeted in the driveway by a very large and very ugly dog. It was none other than Samson. I told Bob that we’d looked at Samson ourselves, but that the rest of my family didn’t really like him. Bob said, “That’s how my kids felt, too. But my wife decided that that was the dog she wanted. So I said to the kids, ‘If momma’s not happy, nobody’s happy.’ That’s how we got the dog.”
“If momma’s not happy, nobody’s happy,” Bob said. Now there’s a man who’s come to understand the ins and outs of marriage. It takes love for a marriage to work; it takes hard work for a marriage to work; and it takes sacrifice for a marriage to work. But my friend Bob also understood that if momma’s not happy, nobody’s happy.
Speaking of relationships, back then we lived next door to a couple named Chuck and Kim Wright; no relation to the aforementioned Bob and Jody Wright. In any case, Chuck once said of his marriage to Kim, “I wear the pants in my family. It’s just that Kim tells me which ones to put on.” Now there’s another man who’s come to understand the ins and outs of marriage.
The Apostle Paul is talking about spiritual maturity in the book of Ephesians. He spends the first three chapters writing a beautiful theological treatise on who God is and how he relates to us. Then he spends the next couple of chapters writing a beautiful theological treatise on who we are and how we relate to God. Then in the second half of chapter five he starts talking about the relationship between husbands and wives. What has that got to do with spiritual maturity? What has that got to do with growing up in Christ? Keep that thought in mind as we move on.
This is the thirteenth in a series of sermons entitled, “Living This Side of the Cross.” The thesis of the series is pretty much summed up in verses 14 and 15 in the 4th chapter of the book of Ephesians. There the Apostle Paul writes, “We must no longer be children, tossed to and fro, and blown about by every wind of doctrine. But speaking the truth in love, we must grow up in every way into him who is the head…into Christ Jesus, our Lord.” In other words, this is a sermon series on growing up in Christ.
We talked about how the church is meant to represent the kingdom of God on earth. We said that the kingdom is here, but not fully here. Thus, could it be that the church we have is exactly what God intended when he created the church? Could it be that the church we have provides the very conditions necessary for growing up in Christ? While we live in a throw-away society these days, perhaps there are some things we should not throw away. After all, the providence of God means that wherever we have gotten to – whatever we have done – that is precisely where the road to heaven begins.
We talked about living a worthy life. A worthy life – a life that is truly growing up in Christ – is a life formed in community. Christian maturity develops as we form friendships with the friends of God…not just the friends we prefer. You see, God chooses to act and intervene in the world through us. We see God acting in the world today when we witness the heartfelt convictions of those who serve him.
We encountered what we called Paul’s roadmap through the cosmos. He tells us who we are and where we are going as Christians. We are blessed by God, chosen in Christ, destined for adoption, bestowed grace, lavished forgiveness, made to know the will of God through Christ, and gathered up to God in the end. We are precious children of God – created in the image of God – and destined for eternal life. Do not let anyone ever tell you otherwise.
We noted how Paul refers to us as saints. Paul deliberately chooses a word that identifies us not by what we do for God, but rather, by what God does for us. He is retraining our imaginations to understand ourselves not in terms of how we feel about ourselves – and certainly not in terms of how others might feel about us – but rather, he is retraining our imaginations to understand how God feels about us. In God’s eyes, we are saints. In God’s eyes…we are holy.
We discovered that God bestows grace to sinners like us. Yet the grace of God is a lot like water to a swimmer. It seems as though there is no possible way it could support us. So like the swimmer, we have to lean forward, lift up our legs, and let ourselves go. To coin a phrase, we need to learn to let go…and let God.
We learned that the church is the gift of Christ to the world. Yet there is more to the church than meets the eye. The church is not just bricks and mortar. The church is not just a collection of faithful people. The church is the body of Christ in the world. And it is through the church – and only through the church – that Christ bestows his peace upon us.
We observed what Jesus Christ came to earth to accomplish. He established the church and gave it a commission. That commission is to make God’s wisdom known to the world. What is God’s wisdom? We see God’s wisdom when we possess inscape. Inscape is the capacity to see the God in everything. Inscape is the ability to put on the eyes of God and see the world as God sees the world.
We noted how we describe Jesus Christ as being fully human and fully divine. As the church is referred to as the body of Christ in the world, it follows that the church must also be both human and divine. Thus, while we come to church to encounter the word of God, we also come to church to be transformed by God.
We heard Paul beg us to lead a life worthy of the calling to which we have been called. We do so by way of paraclesis – which has to do with the Holy Spirit. In other words, we strive to get the words of Jesus Christ inside of us so that they become us. We condition ourselves to look at the world through the eyes of love.
We learned that because we are Christian, there should be something different about the way we live our lives. As Cardinal Suhard put it some one hundred years ago, “It means to live in such a way that one’s life would not make sense if God did not exist.” In other words, we are called to put off the ways of the world…and put on the ways of God.
Finally, we saw what happens when we fail to put off the ways of the world and put on the way of God. As C.S. Lewis so eloquently put it, “There are two kinds of people in the end: those who say to God, ‘Thy will be done,’ and those to whom God says, ‘Thy will be done.’” In other words, sin…has its consequences.
Now with all those lofty theosophical thoughts in mind, why would Paul suddenly turn to the relationship between a husband and a wife? Why would Paul consider something so basic and banal as marriage? I think the reason is this: to keep us grounded. You see, we all have a tendency to think a bit too much of ourselves. When it comes to answering the call of God, we want to encounter a burning bush like Moses and lead God’s people to freedom. When it comes to answering the call of God, we want to lead a revolution like Martin Luther King, Jr. When it comes to answering the call of God, we want the task to be profound, life-altering and world-transforming.
Paul asks, regarding how we’ve answered the call of God, how are we treating our husbands or our wives? You see, Paul realizes that not all of us are going to lead a revolution. When it comes to answering the call of God, we begin with the basics. Because if we’re not faithful in the little things, how could we possibly be trusted with big things?
Paul begins with one of the most misunderstood lines in all of Scripture. “Wives, be subject to your husbands,” he says. “Wives, be subject to your husbands.” Why would Paul say such a thing? Some have theorized that Paul was very unhappily married. Others have theorized that we should chalk it up to the fact that Paul lived in a patriarchal society. Here’s my theory.
In the first book of Corinthians Paul says, “Women, be silent in church.” Why did he say that? Because in those days, the language of the day was Aramaic. Yet the Scriptures were written in Hebrew. The men were taught Hebrew, but the women were not. What’s more, the men sat on one side of the sanctuary, while the women sat on the other. Thus, while the preacher spoke in Hebrew, the women didn’t understand a word he was saying. So what did the women start to do? They started to talk amongst themselves. Their chattering prevented the men from hearing. Thus, Paul says, “Women, be silent in church.”
Which is part and parcel to why Paul says, “Wives, be subject to your husbands.” The men understood the Scriptures in those days, while the women did not. Thus, the women needed to listen to their husbands to comprehend the word of God. Our society has changed a little bit in the last 2000 years.
But notice what Paul says next. He says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” To love someone…is to gladly take the lower place, is it not? Thus, perhaps the message Paul is really trying to communicate is that marriage entails mutual submission. Not a popular concept in this day and age.
A wise older man in this church taught me how that works. He said, “When my wife and I got married, we agreed to abide by the rule of 60/40.” I said, “What’s the rule of 60/40?” He said, “We agreed to give 60% and expect 40% in return.” Then, with a gleam in his eye, he leaned forward and said, “Sometimes, it’s 70/30.”
Paul seems to believe that spiritual maturity first entails faithfulness in the little things, like a marriage. And a healthy marriage necessarily implies mutual submission. We are not always going to get our way. He goes on to talk about the relationship between children and their parents. “Children, obey your parents in the Lord,” he says. Later he adds, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”
I think we may have just hit upon what may be the greatest problem in our society today. It has to do with a lack of respect for authority. Far too many children do not obey their parents, and far too few parents bring their children up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. Think about it. What is my impetus for doing the right thing if there is no God? Why would I respect the rights of another person if there is no God? Because it’s the right thing to do? Says who? If there is no respect for authority – if children are not brought up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord – the end result is chaos. The end result…is exactly what we have in our society today. Maybe the church is trying to do a good thing after all, huh?
Paul goes on to talk about the relationship between slaves and their masters. Not many of us have slaves any more, but maybe the message is applicable just the same. To the slaves, he says, “Render service with enthusiasm, as to the Lord, and not as to men and women.” To the masters he says, “Do the same to them.” Could this not be applied to the workplace? Could not employees render service with enthusiasm, as to the Lord, and could not employers treat their employees well? Again Paul seems to be saying that if we’re not faithful in the little things, how could we possibly be trusted with big things?
I want to illustrate this with a concept I came up with when President Bill Clinton was caught having an extramarital affair. Now Bill Clinton was a Southern Baptist. That’s a very conservative faith. When the Bible says, “Thou shalt not commit adultery,” the Southern Baptist is taught to take those words at face value.
The problem comes when one encounters what I like to call the boxes of life. There’s my family box over here, there’s my work box over here, there’s my personal life box over here, and there’s my faith box over here. Each box is a separate category of my life, and ne’er the twain shall meet. One does not inform the other, nor does one influence the other. That’s how a Southern Baptist can have an extramarital affair. It happens when one’s faith has no influence on one’s behavior.
Paul seems to be saying that in order to live a mature Christian life, one’s faith box must be over and above the other boxes of life. One’s faith must inform one’s family life, one’s work life, and one’s personal life. After all, if we’re not faithful in the little things, how could we possibly be trusted with big things? Amen.
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